Getting Published: My Experience Contributing a Story

According to statistics, 80% of people believe they “have a book in them.” Meaning—they believe their unique life experiences are interesting enough to write a book. Obviously, the follow-through on that statistic is nowhere near that high, but shows a remarkable trend of how people view themselves nonetheless.

The question I would ask is: How many people have an opportunity to share their unique life experiences? What makes a publisher want to tell your story? I think it’s somewhere between what you’ve done and who you know—which is arguably how everything works. However, if you do get the opportunity, you don’t necessarily have to write the entire story. My advice is: Contribute first and take it from there.

Through a contact last October, I was contacted by publisher Jossey-Bass and asked if I would contribute a story about leadership. I jumped at the opportunity and began formulating what I believe is a common problem for most young leaders: Simply getting started. Moreover, there is a common misconception that a person must be in a position of rank or formal authority in order to be a leader. This is entirely not true.

I decided to use an experience at the Air Force Academy involving a core engineering class since the book would focus on “student leadership.”

Two excerpts:

“The requirements were vague, and all the work had to be completed by the group members alone, with no outside assistance. I decided to step up and make some suggestions, even though I didn’t understand the technical scope of the project.”

“When I first thought about leadership, I imagined a truly dynamic individual who gains respect through actions over time. But in this situation, the professor had not assigned a group leader, and the students didn’t have enough time in their daily schedules to meet on a regular basis and allow a leader to emerge. The group was waiting for someone to lead, so I decided to take the challenge.”

The book, called The Student Leadership Challenge: Five Practices for Exemplary Leaders is available in stores or online.

The Candidates on Taxes

The latest issue of Fortune Magazine has two separate articles, one by John McCain, and the other by Barack Obama. The articles examine the candidates view of the economy, where it’s headed, and what they plan to do (if elected) to get the economy rolling again. Of course the main highlights are taxes, social responsibility, and past/present views related to their individual political parties.

One area that confused me a bit was McCain’s comments to shipyard workers in Jacksonville, Fla. He told Fortune: “I think the fundamentals of the U.S. economy are very strong. We’re still the most innovative, the greatest exporter, the greatest producer.” Really? I think we’re third most innovative behind China and Japan, certainly not the greatest exporter (China?), and definitely not the greatest producer. However, I’d say we are the greatest consumer.

Taxes are another huge issue at hand. Does anyone really understand the candidate’s position? The table below is from taxpolicycenter.org, and seeks to better educate voters on the presidential candidate’s tax proposals:

John McCain:

- Allow first-year deduction of 3 and 5-year equipment, deny interest deductions (expires)
- Reduce maximum corporate tax rate from 35 to 25 percent
- Increase the dependent exemption by 70 percent
- Suspend the federal gas tax (18.4 cents per gallon from this Memorial Day until Labor Day
- Convert R&D credit to 10 percent of wages incurred for R&D, make permanent
- Keep the current rates on dividends and capital gains
- Make permanent all provisions other than the estate tax repeal
- Extend and index 2007 AMT patch, further increase exemption by 5 percent in excess of inflation after 2013 (temporarily)
- Make permanent estate tax with $5 million exemption and 15 percent rate
- Give taxpayers the option of an alternative tax system with two rates and a larger standard deduction and personal exemption
- Eliminate oil and gas loopholes
- Unspecified corporate base broadeners
- Eliminate earmarked projects from the budget, freeze nonmilitary discretionary spending for one year, eliminate programs
- Replace exclusion from income for employer sponsored health insurance with refundable credit of $2,500 for individuals and $5,000 for families
- Require a 3/5 majority vote in Congress to raise taxes
- Ban internet and cell phone taxes
- Higher premiums for Medicare prescription drug coverage for single people earning more than $82,000 and couples earning more than $164,000

Barack Obama:

- Refundable Making Work Pay tax credit of 6.2 percent of earnings up to a maximum of $8,100
Refundable Universal Mortgage Credit of 10 percent or mortgage interest for nonitemizers, capped at $800 ($8,000 of interest)
- Eliminate income tax for senior making less than $50,000 per year
- First-time buyers tax credit for new farmers
- Small Business and Microenterprise Initiative tax credit of 20 percent on up to $50,000 of investment in small owner-operated businesses
- Make R&D and renewable enery production tax credit (wind, solar) permanent
- Extend childless EITC phase-in range and increase phaseout threshold, double the phase-in and phase-out rates for childless individuals paying child support, increase EITC phase-in rate to 45 percent for families with three or more children; increase add-on to EITC phase-out threshold for married filers to $5,000
- Make CDCTC refundable and allow low-income families to receive up to a 50 percent credit for child care expenses
- Make CDCTC refundable and allow low-income families to receive up to a 50 percent credit for child care expenses
- Make saver's credit refundable and change to a 50 percent match of the first $1,000 of savings, phases out beginning before $75,000
- Increase Hope credit 100% match rate to $4,000 for college education and make refundable, rename American Opportunity Tax Credit
- Mandate automatic 401(k)s and automatic IRAs
- Increase maximum capital gains rate to 25 percent
- Require information reporting of basis for gains
- Eliminate capital gains taxation of start-up businesses and provide capital gains tax break for landowners selling to beginning family farmers
- Permanently extend marriage penalty relief, adoption credit expansions, 10,15,25, and 28% rates, EITC simplification
- Restore 36 and 39.6% statutory income tax rates, Restore PEP and Pease phaseouts for households making more than $250,000, increase in PEP and Pease threshold
- Extend and index 2007 AMT patch
- Make permanent estate tax with $3.5 million exemption and 45 percent rate
- Give taxpayers the option of pre -filled tax forms to verify, sign, return to IRS
- Eliminate oil and gas loopholes
- Close loopholes in the corporate tax deductibility of CEO pay
- Tax carried interest as ordinary, Increase the highest bracket for capital gains and dividends
- Reallocate multinational tax deductions
- Codify economic substance doctrine
- Create international tax haven watch list
- Other unspecified revenue raising provisions
- Income-related federal tax subsidies for health insurance
- Social Security/payroll taxes: increase the maximum amount of earnings covered by Social Security

I'm Back! An Update from June 11-23

Hello blog readers! Glad to be back! My first update as a married man:

The wedding in Plano, TX was awesome! The reception was held at the Infomart building in Dallas, TX. It was amazing and I can’t thank everyone enough for helping us make so many memories.

Shortly after the wedding, my new wife and I traveled to Galveston, TX to board the Carnival Conquest cruise ship bound for the Western Caribbean. Let me just say, the honeymoon overall was great; however, I’ll give you the good, the bad, and the ugly of some things:

The Good:

Everything about Carnival as a company was first class. The entertainment, plethora of activities, etc was great and made for an enjoyable trip. The staff overall was funny, interesting, and very personable. In addition, the stop in Cozumel, Mexico was my favorite because Carnival has their own pier right in the downtown area. Cozumel was very clean, entertaining (Senor Frogs!), and cheap. $5 t-shirts, hats, etc..

We swam with the dolphins in Cozumel which I highly recommend if you get the chance. In addition, go swim with the stingrays in Grand Cayman. The trip was relatively cheap and a once in a lifetime opportunity to hold and feed stingrays in their natural habitat.

The food at dinner was exceptional and is included in the basic cruise package.

The Bad:

They certainly are master marketers aboard the ship simply because you have nowhere else to go. If you want something, get ready to pay for it. The all inclusive trip is a joke. Expect to spend a lot of money f you plan to do any offshore excursions, drink alcohol, gamble, pictures, etc… In addition, gratuity is included in everything (food, drinks, and daily room service).

The Ugly:

It was sad to hear the stories of many of the workers on the cruise ship. Most of the workers are foreign and we discovered they are paid next to nothing, and operate mainly on tips, so they are very good at “selling” you.

The stop in Jamaica was a little rough—especially their driving skills! We almost had “human hood ornaments” in the taxis because they simply don’t stop for people. Also, they honk their horns constantly. It was a little scary traveling through the streets.

Overall, I would definitely cruise again. If you are like me and need a vacation with numerous activities, a cruise should satisfy your needs. There is something for all ages and 8 days was a perfect amount of time.

My Last Blog Post Until After June 23rd!

With the wedding rapidly approaching (6 days away!), I’ll be shifting my undivided attention to finalizing the wedding plans (luckily my fiancé and her parents are finishing the majority of them!). That being said, this will be my last blog post until the end of June. I have been thinking of a few things lately, reading a few new books, and truly loving life and realizing I’m very blessed. A few highlights and things coming up:

The Wedding. If you haven’t seen our wedding website yet, I recommend you take a look. We have chosen to share some details of our lives with family and friends, so why not for my blog readers? www.danielleandbrian.weddingwindow.com

The Honeymoon. My fiancé and I are taking a cruise for our honeymoon. We are setting sail on the Carnival Conquest bound for the Western Caribbean with stops in Montego Bay, Jamaica, Grand Cayman, and Cozumel, Mexico. I’ll have details for you later, including tips, tricks, and lessons learned.

An Air Force Officer: I haven’t blogged much about life in the Air Force, so I’ll give you a quick update. I really enjoy the Air Force—especially the people and the mission. Everything about active duty is first class and I am extremely happy with my decision to serve our country. Moreover, I enjoy the challenges associated with government Contracting. It seems like I learn something new every day. More to come as my career progresses…

Reading: Along with the books mentioned in last week’s post, I purchased 1776 by David McCullough yesterday. I have wanted to read it for a long time, so I made an “impulse” buy and picked it up in paperback. The book received fantastic reviews, so I’m excited to get started.

What I've Been Doing Lately: 6.1.08

I spent last week at the Air Force Academy watching my fiancé graduate and had the chance to hear a speech by President George W. Bush. I was impressed by his composure, thoughtfulness, charisma, and overall likeability displayed throughout the day (including a fantastic speech to the graduating class). He carried himself in a humble manner, but jumped at the opportunity to “connect” with the cadets in more meaningful ways. Some of the antics included: Chest bumps, Heisman poses, back-to-back, and a cell phone call to one of the graduates mother. In addition, he took the time to shake every graduates hand and saluted most of them as well (1012 cadets).

*****
On an unrelated note, I saw Keith Urban and Kenny Chesney last night at the University of Phoenix Stadium—Urban is way better live than Chesney by the way. Urban was pure energy, entertainment, and talent while Chesney was more old school country with his cowboy hat, rhythm guitar, and laid back attitude.

*****
Currently Reading:

The Pocket Idiot’s Guide to Being a Groom by Jennifer Lata Rung and Mark Rung
Gods of Tin by James Salter
In A Pit with A Lion On A Snowy Day by Mark Batterson
The Crisis of Islam: Holy War and Unholy Terror by Bernard Lewis

Thinking About:

-The Wedding (13 days!)
-Wondering if my car is about to die because I’m sensing a problem I’ve had before (last time I needed a new transmission…ouch!)
-Trying to decide if I should renew my subscription to Fortune Magazine…It has been a very informative magazine, but I may move on to something a little deeper with more of a global spin (The Economist?)

Buffett on the Economy

The American economy is undoubtedly facing an uphill battle. The slow erosion of the housing market coupled with record oil prices is putting a strain on consumers and their pocket books. Even Warren Buffett is concerned, and expects this "recession" to last a while. However, he is sticking to what he knows best, and that’s to continue buying. He stated yesterday, even “If the world were falling apart I'd still invest in companies.” That’s a pretty strong statement, and a lesson to everyone listening: Keep buying!

Read the full article here

Some Questions to Ask Yourself Before Starting a Business

Just came across a great article by Melanie Lindner at Forbes Magazine that discusses the realities of starting a business. Moreover, it addresses some of the questions entrepreneurs must ask themselves before funding a new business venture. The following is an excerpt:

“The first question you should ask: Do you have a compelling value proposition? This point is forever worth repeating: Great ideas are only great business ideas if you can convince people to pay for your product or service at a price above what it costs you to deliver it. Just because you think the world needs new canine cologne doesn't mean anyone else agrees--or if they do, that they would be willing to pay enough to cover your electric bill.”

I would like to start a business at some point in my life, so I find articles like this very valuable. It seems there is no such thing as “too much advice” when starting a business—although simply “starting” is usually the hang-up.

Click here for the full article

Life After Graduation: Thoughts from an Air Force Academy Graduate One Year Later

I’ve been thinking of writing a post highlighting some “lessons learned/tips & tricks” that I wish I would have known after graduating the Air Force Academy. Even though all AFSCs and Air Force Bases will be a little bit different, the following should give graduating cadets a head-start:

1. Contact your base if you don’t hear from someone by mid-June. You will likely be assigned a sponsor; however, some bases may not get all the information they need about you from the Academy. You will attend Air and Space Basic Course (ASBC) and your AFSC specific training within the first year. Contacting your base will ensure they know about you and get you signed up for these courses. I didn’t want to be “that-guy” who bothered my incoming base, but the reality is that it would have made things easier for both parties.

2. Volunteer early in your career. You’re going to do nothing but get busier as time goes by, so seek volunteer opportunities early in your career. There are an incredible amount of volunteer opportunities if you’re willing to “step-up” and get involved. However, don’t view these opportunities as a way to get a bullet for an OPR or to make yourself look good—do things because you want to do them. Be humble in everything you do and let your performance do the talking. Don’t forget: Someone is always watching you!

3. Be humble in person but blunt on paper. The caveat to remaining humble is that nobody cares about your career more than you do, so be sure to take no prisoners when writing your OPR. The new OPR gives you roughly ten bullet statements that should tell a story about you for an entire year, so make sure there is significant impact in your bullets! Writing an OPR is an art and can be mind numbing, so be sure and have your mentors/peers help you.

4. Keep a running log of every important thing you’ve done throughout the year. Maintain an easy to locate document on your computer at work that includes the Who, What, When, Where, and Why of everything you’ve done throughout the year. It is challenging enough to write an OPR, and even more challenging if you don’t remember what you’ve done for the past year.

5. Fully fund your Roth IRA before putting any money into the Thrift Savings Plan (TSP). I’m not sure what the confusion is between these investment vehicles, but most people don’t understand the difference. A passively managed low cost index fund is still significantly better than an actively managed mutual fund in the long run. Put as much money as you can into a Roth IRA by dollar-cost averaging in low-cost index funds—NOT mutual funds! The military TSP operates much like a Traditional IRA because it offers tax-deferred contributions—meaning you’ll pay taxes on your money when you want it later in life. You will pay taxes on your Roth IRA contributions going in, but your money will grow tax free. There are situations (if you deploy) where the TSP can be better, so be sure to review your options. In addition, if the military TSP ever begins “matching” contributions, re-visit the idea at that time.

6. Have a basic understanding of ALL costs associated with buying a home. The basic rule of thumb says not to buy a home unless you plan to live there for five years or more. Obviously, there are instances where it works out, but make sure you understand all costs/risks. In addition, the housing market will rise and fall, so make sure you know what you can afford. Some things to consider: mortgage rate, taxes, utilities, HOA fees or other expenses, etc. If you do choose to buy a home, get a fixed-rate mortgage—NOT an adjustable-rate mortgage (ARM). With the recent credit crunch, there are numerous horror stories of people that used builder incentives to get great mortgage rates (ARMs) without fully understanding the risk-reward trade-off.

7. You graduated, but you didn't retire. Don’t get me wrong here, graduation day is/was/will be one of the greatest days of your life, so enjoy it! However, the mentality of some recent graduates is that you’ve conquered the world and have earned retirement. The bottom line is that you start over, which is good for some people and bad for some people. If you’ve had a less than stellar cadet career, you get a clean slate. If you did very well as a cadet, nobody cares— you still have to perform every day. Use your free time to study for graduate school exams. Get involved in your local community. Try new things that may interest you. You’ve had your whole life programmed for four years, so it may take some time to adjust to your new surroundings. In addition, you may have to “re-learn” things about yourself and what you truly like to do in your free time.

8. Continue networking with your fellow graduates/alumni. There are some amazing graduates doing some amazing things both in and out of the military. The best part is that they are usually more than willing to help you out if you take the initiative. Seek them out as mentors and ask for their advice—don’t forget it’s still a “who you know” world.

Final thoughts: The Air Force Academy has prepared you in ways you won’t fully understand or appreciate until you leave. Take advantage of this. Be your own person and figure out your own leadership style, not somebody else's. Whatever you are, be a good one. Feel free to contact me if you have additional questions at: breese27(at)yahoo.com or find me on my blog at http://www.brianreeseblogs.com/

Four Things to do In Your 20's: A Response to Cameron Schaefer

The following is my response to Cameron Schaefer as he has asked for input towards his future post called: 20 Things to Do in Your 20’s. Why my top four you might ask? Why four and not five? Why four and not ten? Because I don’t want you to make this your top 10 list. Use the following in your own way, and not simply the “secret to life” top 10 list…

1. Read 2-3 Books per Month (or more). Once you’re finished with college and all those “mandatory” reads, pick up some books that may actually interest you. For me, these books are usually about investing, religion, or psychology. Ben Casnocha calls this exposing yourself to as much randomness as possible—I think he has a great point here. Read a book nobody is reading. Listen to a lecture that most people are sleeping through. Ask questions, dig deeper, and take notes. I find I don’t remember much if I don’t write it down. Cameron Schaefer wrote a great post called: 7 Ways to Remember What You Read.

2. Actively Seek Mentors. For some reason there seems to be confusion regarding what constitutes a mentor. I define a mentor as anyone who can potentially add value to something. A friend can be a mentor. A relative can be a mentor. Moreover, the best mentors I’ve had are the people that challenge you to be better and constantly seek to improve you as the mentee. Find people you can bounce ideas off of. I have mentors that I talk business with. I have mentors that I talk about Christianity and religion with. I have mentors at work, etc, etc. Just remember: People are always willing to help you and nobody reaches their full potential alone.

3. Study the “Big 3”: Religion (or spirituality), Your Marriage, and Your Finances. If you don’t have a very good grasp of all of these, you will never enjoy the fullness of life and all that it has in store for you. Find yourself spiritually and seek the will of God in everything you do. If you aren’t spiritual or you’re not religious (or both), you will never completely find happiness and contentment in your life. You may find fleeting moments, but you won’t be able to sustain them for any period of time.

a. Learn to love your spouse unconditionally and constantly work to be a better husband/wife. I am currently reading just about anything I can get my hands on related to improving your marriage and starting out right. Will there be growing pains? Of course. But how many people make a life changing decision without proper preparation? Unfortunately, way to many because ½ end in divorce. Don’t be a statistic!

b. If you don’t understand the world of finance and investing, start reading right now! I have a few books to get you started: A Random Walk Down Wall-Street by Burton Malkiel and The Little Book of Common Sense Investing by John Bogle. Unfortunately, personal finance and investing are not mandatory subjects in public schools, so you must be the one to realize the importance of learning these topics! Do you know how to retire with more than $1,000,000.00? Is it better for you to lease a new car, buy a new car, or buy a used car? When you buy a home, should you get a fixed-rate mortgage or an adjustable rate mortgage? Depending on your tax bracket, what is the best investment strategy for you? If you can’t answer all of these questions with ease, you probably need to brush up a bit. Read. Read. Read.

4. “Whatever You Are Be A Good One” – Abraham Lincoln. My favorite quote by one of the greatest Presidents of all time. Don’t complain about the situation you are in—find ways to make it better. No matter what you are doing, be the very best and take pride in what you do and who you are. Look at every situation as if it is the exact situation you are supposed to be in. Subscribe to the mantra: “Live for Today, Dream for Tomorrow.” Be the best at what you are today, but always work to improve and seek opportunities when they present themselves. Don’t ever forget people are always watching you. Don't live your life with regrets.

What I'm Doing 5.1.08

In an effort to both better understand my fiancé and simply to learn more about Christianity, I am reading two books on Catholicism. I have to admit that I’ve been a bit ignorant when it comes to the majority of Catholic beliefs. Although I don’t fully understand everything (nor agree with everything), it has been fun searching passages and interpreting the Bible in different ways.

Also, as our wedding day rapidly approaches (June 14th), my fiancé and I have been diligently reading “Before You Say: I Do,” by H. Norman Wright. We each have a copy, so we’ve been exchanging ideas over the phone. We both feel it is important to discuss a lot of marital issues and challenges before they actually happen. Most people do lots of homework before making important decisions, so why not do the same when preparing for marriage?

Currently Reading:
Rome Sweet Home by Scott and Kimberly Hahn

Catholicism For Dummies by John Trigilio and Kenneth Brighenti

Before You Say “I Do” by H. Norman Wright

Bringing Down the House by Ben Mezrich

Thinking About:
Importance of Mental Preparation

How Inflation Changes Savings Rules

De-Stress in Mere Minutes

The Myth of More

Laughing About:
Darwin Awards Anyone?

Warren Buffett Speaks...

When Warren Buffett speaks, people listen. With Wall Street in panic mode along with the housing and credit markets, it’s always nice to get feedback from the Oracle of Omaha. The following are excerpts from the Fortune Magazine article titled: "What Warren Thinks…"

"Q: How do you get your ideas?

A: I just read. I read all day. I mean, we put $500 million in PetroChina. All I did was read the annual report. (Editor’s note: Berkshire purchased the shares five years ago and sold them in 2007 for $4 billion.

Q: What advice would you give someone who is not professional investor? Where should they put their money?

A: Well, if they’re not going to be an active investor—and very few should try to do that—then they should just stay with index funds. Any low-cost index fund. And they should buy it over time. They’re not going to be able to pick the right price and the right time. What they want to do is avoid the wrong price and wrong stock. You just make sure you own a piece of American business, and you don’t buy all at one time.

Q: By your rule, now seems like a good time to be greedy. People are pretty fearful.

A: You’re right. They are going in that direction. That’s why stocks are cheaper. Stocks are a better buy today than they were a year ago. Or three years ago."

Everything Buffett says here is so simple and all encompassing—now just implement the advice: Read as much as you can; dollar cost average in a low-cost index fund; keep buying, keep buying, keep buying…

A Great Resource: RealSimple.com

If you have never heard of Real Simple, I suggest you click the link—especially if you travel. My Mom reads the magazine called Real Simple—a magazine that highlights the good, the bad, and the ugly of basically everything. A special issue called Real Simple Travel lists the best places to travel depending on the time of year; it tells you what types of clothes to wear, the best places to eat, where to stay, and endless tips and tricks to make the most of your vacations.

The part of the magazine that caught my attention is a section called: The Travelers Handbook. It features advice from A-Z such as: awesome travel websites, the best way to write a postcard, how to sleep better on an airplane, as well as other mind grenades that should keep you busy.

For instance, do you know when you should hand out tips?

“Anna Post, Emily Post’s great-great-granddaughter and the spokesperson for the Emily Post Institute, shares, well, tips on what to hand out when.

Doorman: $2 for help with bags, $1 for a hailed cab.

Taxi driver: 10 to 15 percent. Add an extra dollar or two if he/she helps with the bags.

Airport porter: Most porters charge $2 for the first bag. If they don’t, you should pay at least that. Add a dollar or two for good service.

Other airport staff (ticket agents, flight attendants): Don’t tip them. It can be tempting to slip an agent a $20 bill in the hopes that you’ll get better treatment out of the deal, but that comes off as smarmy.

Bellhop: $2 for the first bag, $1 a bag after that.

Housekeeping: $2 to $5 a day. Leave this tip daily, as you often have a different person cleaning your room each day. (Leave a note so the housekeeper knows the money is for her.)

Concierge: $5 to $10 every time she helps you with something above and beyond the job description, like scoring hard-to-get tickets to a show. For guidelines on tipping in other countries, click here”

Should You Settle?

The March edition of The Atlantic has an article that legitimately made me upset because I think it highlights some of the problems with society’s view of marriage. The article, written by Lori Gottlieb titled Marry Him—The case for settling for Mr. Good Enough undoubtedly offers an “out of the box” perspective of marriage, but principally wrong (in my opinion), and out of touch with reality nonetheless.

She does; however, offer a fair perspective of some of the challenges facing women these days—especially the unmarried 30 something crowd:

“To the outside world, of course, we still call ourselves feminists and insist—vehemently, even—that we’re independent and self-sufficient and don’t believe in any of that damsel-in-distress stuff, but in reality, we aren’t fish who can do without a bicycle, we’re women who want a traditional family. And despite growing up in an era when the centuries-old mantra to get married young was finally (and, it seemed, refreshingly) replaced by encouragement to postpone that milestone in pursuit of high ideals (education! career! but also true love!), every woman I know—no matter how successful and ambitious, how financially and emotionally secure—feels panic, occasionally coupled with desperation, if she hits 30 and finds herself unmarried...all I can say is, if you say you’re not worried, either you’re in denial or you’re lying.”

I don’t disagree with her thoughts here; however, I have a huge issue with her solution. She says: “My advice is this: Settle! That’s right. Don’t worry about passion or intense connection.” Is this the criteria people use for marriage? To find someone good enough that you may kinda like and decide to marry them? Do you think there is a connection between this type of attitude towards marriage and the fact that 50% of them end in divorce?

Of course the advice to settle arrives from a woman who conceived a child with donor sperm because she hadn’t found Mr. Right. WHAT?! Is this even allowed? The boy now has the pleasure of growing up fatherless because the idea of motherhood couldn’t wait for true love…

I guess at a time when ideals and principles seem to be at an all time low, it’s articles like this that truly make my blood boil…

More of my thoughts on marriage:
The Secret Ingredient for a Successful Marriage
Marriage and Personal Finance: Yes, They Are Related!
Why You Should Get Married

Our Fascination with "Free"

I came across an interesting article today written by Paul J. Lim for Yahoo Finance. The article, called “Why you’re a big sucker,” captures a growing problem in society: Spending more when we planned to spend less.

The question, then, is why do we spend more than we want to? Dan Ariely, a noted behavioral economist says he’s found the answer: Our fascination with “free” offers. Marketing 101 at its finest—appealing to or tricking the senses in order for people to spend more money. Dan Ariely helps to explain part of the problem in the following excerpt:

“Question: How else do we act against our best interests?

A. By comparing prices on similar items.

Question: Wait, I thought that was smart to do?

A. It is, but only if you compare everything with everything. If you just compare items near one another, you open yourself up to being influenced. When you open a menu at a restaurant, you may not realize that the prices you see affect what you're willing to pay. If the most expensive entrée is $45, you might decide $30 is an acceptable price. Should the restaurant add a $60 dish, you may be willing to pay $45. The same issue comes up when shopping for real estate. Letting a broker show you a house above the top of your range can be costly.

Question: So how do we overcome irrationality?

A. There's no cure-all. But when I see the word free, I now ask myself, "What's the seller trying to do here?" Also, it sounds strange, but try not to look at price, not at first. Decide what you want and what you're willing to pay without being influenced by outside factors.”

I’ve noticed major department stores doing this more and more. Raising the sticker price well above what someone may be willing to pay, but advertising the entire store at 50%-75% off. This marketing act tricks the senses into believing we are getting a great deal—but are we?

Although it may be a stretch to suggest completely ignoring the sticker price, knowing what you’re willing to pay and setting your limits will surely save you money in the long run...

Free Tax Software for Military Members

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The software is incredibly easy to use, and allows you to e-file both your federal and state tax returns. It took about one hour to complete my entire tax return for both federal and state.

*TaxCut Basic Online® by H&R Block is free to active duty, National Guard, and Reserve service members and their families. To access this free service provided by the Department of Defense, you must be registered and logged in to the Military OneSource Web site.

What I've Been Doing Lately (3.25.08)

Las Vegas:

I just returned from a weekend in Las Vegas with my fiance! Incredible as usual (my third trip to Vegas)—especially if you like to gamble! Endless leisurely activities: Casinos, shows, pools, food, drinks, etc. Anything you’ve ever wanted to do you can do in Vegas. I highly recommend going if you haven’t already. I’ve stayed at Treasure Island, Tropicana, and now Mandalay Bay. All have their differing qualities, but all nice places nonetheless. Treasure Island is more of a family type atmosphere—meaning more activities for children. Tropicana is a throwback to the 1970’s era—decent overall, but not very extravagant. Mandalay Bay is the nicest casino/hotel out of the three. It is definitely classier and caters to the high rollers. In addition, I think it has the best pool of any casino/hotel on the Strip. The only catch is you’ll likely pay more money to stay, and its location is not the best (end of the Strip). Flights are cheap, and the drive from Phoenix is dangerously close!

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Camping:

Yes, it’s true. I am beginning my search for some decent camping/hiking equipment. With all the great mountainous areas and hiking trails around Arizona, I figure it’s about time to get outdoors. Please let me know if you have recommendations for equipment—REI, eBay, etc.

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Reading:

-The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
-The Bible by God
-Where Have All the Leaders Gone by Lee Iacocca

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Buying:

I purchased a 4GB iPod yesterday from Target. I’ll let you know more details as I begin to add music. I was desperately in need of another one to occupy my workout hours. I’ve been using one of the original iPod’s and the software has been acting up—freezing, etc. Hopefully this one will work better!

How to Make Yourself More Interesting

The struggle to break the day to day routine of living within your comfort zone is something you can only accomplish through conscious undertaking. It is simply too easy to wake up everyday to the beat of the same drum. In fact, it’s human nature—we love our routine. I find myself struggling from this “disease” after four years of having my days and nights planned well in advance—day after day after day. However, I’m working to break the old routine and try different activities. In fact, I think stepping outside your comfort zone will make you a much more interesting person. In addition, you may find some things about yourself that you never knew before.

I have some very interesting people in my life, and I’ve taken some time to think deeply about what makes them interesting. Moreover, some of what you read is from personal experience that I’ve picked up along the way:

1. Read, Read, Read. Ok, I realize this is not a new idea. However, there is a bit of a twist. Read both fiction and non-fiction. Read magazines. Read your friend’s blogs. Read random people’s blogs that have taken the time to comment—they probably have something interesting to say. More importantly, read both for purpose and for pleasure. If you get stuck in academia land too much—meaning you are always marking a book, taking notes, etc, you never really allow yourself to take a new adventure. Getting lost in a good fiction novel can help spark many quality thoughts as well. A special thanks to my brother the Doc—Jared Reese—for suggesting I expand my reading selections. Cameron Schaefer wrote an excellent post related to reading called 7 Ways to Remember What You Read.

2. Learn to Develop Yourself Socially and Don’t Be Afraid to Take Risks. My good friend Andrew Ramsey is one of the most interesting people I know because he takes risks and is always seeking new adventures. His laundry list of cool activities include: Photography, traveling, hiking, camping, an African safari, eating organic foods, wine tastings, etc. Moreover, he has rightfully earned the nickname “The Renaissance Man” because he can literally talk to anyone about anything at anytime of the day no matter what. This is no a joke. He steps outside what an average person would deem “comfortable” and shows a genuine interest in other people. Instead of looking at someone as “weird,” he’ll ask them a deeper question like “That’s awesome, how did you get into that.” His social skills along with his willingness to take risks and be different make him the top dog on my list of “most interesting friends.”

3. Create a Network of Friends for Active Discussions. There are many different ways to attack this idea. The best suggestion I can offer is to have a focus area with friends for different topics. Have friends for business. Have friends to discuss things of a religious or spiritual nature. Have friends that just want to drink beer and watch sports. Find out what you like and don’t like. Having peer mentors can be a very powerful thing. After you have your categories, don’t be afraid to mix and match—discussions get interesting as your personal relationships grow.

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On a related note:
An area I’ve been thinking about deals with therapy. Ben Casnocha writes—Should Everyone Attend Therapy? This brings up an interesting argument in your personal development: Why not have a completely unbiased relationship with a professional? How much growth could come from interacting with someone on a purely professional level with no strings attached?

Savvy Tips for Tax Season

The following are some important but often overlooked concepts from Dennis McCafferty writing for USAA Magazine. I threw one of my own in at the end in regards to investing in individual stocks. Whether you prefer to do your own taxes or not, at least the following ideas should jog your memory and save you some money. I prefer to do my own taxes for a couple of reasons. 1) It is a great learning experience, and allows me to stay engaged with my finances, and 2) I am a finance geek!

Just Do It: Some 10 percent of taxpayer file after April 15, according to Cohesive, a tax-preparation and planning firm in California. But they might as well dump their money on the street. “At least 98 percent of the clients who come to us late pay more taxes,” says Cohesive founder and owner Karla Dennis, enrolled agent. “In several instances, we point out missing deductions, but there’s simply no time to gather the needed documentation to support them.” Bottom line here is start early. Don’t wait until the last minute.

Make Tax-Savvy Investments: Two relatively conservative investments can help give tax relief. A municipal bond fund is similar to a taxable bond fund, but all of the bonds in the fund are issued by a state, city or local government, and the fund generates income that is not subject to U.S. income tax. Some funds hold only bonds issued in one state, and if you live in that state, produce income that is exempt from both federal and state income taxes. This type of investment typically is suitable for someone in a higher tax bracket. A fixed annuity is a guaranteed investment. Similar to a certificate of deposit, or CD, a fixed annuity will pay a set, fixed interest rate. Depending on the annuity, the interest rate may reset or fluctuate periodically. From an income tax standpoint, the perk is that you will not pay income tax on the earnings until you withdraw them from the annuity.

Give and Receive: Donating old clothes, tools, books and items collecting dust to qualified charities may entitle you to a charitable contribution deduction. A recent change in the rules now requires that in order to take the deduction you must get documentation of the donation from the recipient organization, which also must be eligible for tax-deduction donations. “Most clients forget that non-cash donations are eligible,” says Ronald Park, managing partner of a Texas based accounting firm. “Cleaning out the closet once a year can save you not only space, but money.”

Deduct Moving Expenses: If you’re a member of the armed services, you probably know you’re entitled to deduct unreimbursed moving expenses. But make sure you do it. Civilians generally need to meet certain time and distance requirements to deduct moving expenses, but if you’re active duty and you move, those requirements can be waived.

Be Smart About College Savings: Many savings plans don’t have great tax advantages. If college savings is the primary goal for any savings account you open for a child, a 529 plan or Coverdell education savings account might be the best bet. “Forget savings accounts and bonds,” says Beth Wiggins, a Texas certified public accountant with tax and accounting firm BKD LLP. “Income from these accounts may be taxed at the parents’ tax rate until the child is 24. Instead, focus entirely upon college savings plans, such as Coverdell accounts or 529s, where earnings are never taxed if used for educational expenses.”

I’m going to add one of my own that wasn’t mentioned in the article, but can help defray some of your losses if you invest in individual stocks, while minimizing the taxes you will pay on your winners (if you choose to sell).

Hold Your Winners, Sell Your Losers: This idea runs contrary to what “feels good.” Mainly because you tend to think your losing stocks will “come back.” However, research shows routinely that you should do the opposite. Selling a winning stock before the one year mark means you’re going to pay short-term capital gains taxes (often taxed as ordinary income). Instead, hold your winners for the long run, and avoid this substantial penalty. On the flip side, sell your losers and write-off the loss. Take the deduction as long as you can swallow the psychological pain. I’ve done this before on a terrible decision I made a couple of years ago. Long story short, at least I got a tax deduction after the stock lost 80% of its value.

More tips from USAA here

A Quote from the Index Fund Advisors

With all the market turmoil of late, I feel a reminder quote from the Index Fund Advisors regarding the importance of diversification and trying not to “time” individual stocks is worthy of revisiting.

“If there’s 10,000 people looking at the stocks and trying to pick winners, one in 10,000 is going to score, by chance alone, a great coup, and that’s all that’s going on. It’s a game, it’s a chance operation, and people think they are doing something purposeful…but they’re really not.”

-Merton Miller, Nobel Laureate and Professor of Economics, University of Chicago, Transcript of the PBS Nova Special, “The Trillion Dollar Bet”

One Difference Between Leaders and Managers

A short blurb from The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People calendar explains one difference between leaders and managers:

“Effective management is putting first things first. While leadership decides what “first things” are, it is management that puts them first—day-by-day, moment-by-moment. Management is discipline and the act of carrying it out. The word “discipline” derives from “disciple,” which means one is a disciple to philosophy, principles, values, an overriding purpose, a subordinate goal, or a person who represents that goal.”

Which would you rather be: A leader or a manager…why not strive to be both?

Cameron Schaefer explains some of the differences between leaders and managers here

A Few Quick Notes

Some things I've been doing over the past couple weeks:

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I just went over 100 blog posts! Hopefully many more to come!

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After truly enjoying the The Kite-Runner by Khaled Hosseini, I picked up his second novel, A Thousand Splendid Suns, and have nearly read the entire book in about a week (which is fast for me). Although it’s a fiction novel, many of the locations, landmarks, themes, etc, are culturally correct, which help paint a vivid portrait of the struggles in Afghanistan. I highly recommend both books for anyone with an interest in other cultures.

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As my fiancée and I rapidly approach our wedding day—June 14th—I discovered the need for another credit card. The reason I say “another” card is because I have a Capital One no hassle card. However, there are no benefits associated with that particular card; I wanted to get something for making purchases—such as points or cash rewards that can be used towards airfare, hotels, rental cars, etc. I settled on the Blue Sky card from American Express—for a couple reasons:

Zero percent introductory APR on purchases. Many cards offer zero percent APR on balance transfers, but very few have zero percent on new purchases. Moreover, many of the cards offering cash back incentives or thousands of free bonus points for signing up carry yearly fees ranging from $10-$100—another thing I didn’t want.

Travel incentives. As someone that travels a fair amount, and knowing I’ll be traveling even more in the future, I can’t think of a better way to keep cash in my pockets than special deals for doing something I’d be doing anyway. Why not pay yourself back for making these purchases?

The zero percent introductory APR lasts for six months, which gives me plenty of time to earn points and other rewards for travel until marriage, when I'll pay off the balance in full. The card allows me to pre-pay for the wedding, honeymoon, and other expenses without making a huge dent in my checking account. All I have to do is make the minimum monthly payment until the end of the introductory period and there is no additional interest.

Creditcards.com is a great resource to compare based on your individual needs.

What credit cards do you carry?

What Will Happen To Stocks if a Democrat Wins?

I came across an interesting article today compiled by Mick Weinstein who publishes The Best Stock Blogs every Friday on Yahoo Finance. Various people have written opinions in an attempt to determine what an Obama led White House may mean for the American economy (Obama has a five-point lead over John McCain, according to RealClearPolitics):

• From the left: Kris Tuttle of Research 2.0 believes a November Obama victory could "materially change the world perception of the United States, which has suffered terribly under the Bush/Cheney administration." For Wall Street, that would mean "a little less uncertainty and an improved appetite for things American, including the dollar, [to] help the market recover over time."

• From the right: Donald Luskin at SmartMoney, an "unpaid economic advisor to Senator McCain," compares data from prediction market Intrade.com to equities' performance over the past couple months to conclude that "stocks have absorbed the high probability that the next president will be a Democrat. ... at first stocks were frightened by the rising prospect that the Democratic nominee might be Barack Obama. But ... stocks have now changed their minds -- they now prefer Obama to be the nominee instead of Hillary Clinton."

• San Diego-based portfolio manager Gary Gordon sees value in analyzing both the candidates' voting records and what they're saying on the campaign trail. Obama's vocal support for alternative fuels leads one to expect alternative fuels to pop higher; that could mean exchange traded funds such as the Market Vectors Alternative Energy ETF (GEX) and Powershares Global Clean Energy Fund (PBD) will outperform.

Gordon also notes that "in Obama's Wisconsin victory speech, he spoke about shifting tax incentives away from multinationals that ship jobs abroad. And he wants to give tax incentives to upstarts and smaller firms that invest in Americans." Good news for small-cap stocks? Talk? Words? Perhaps," says Gordon, "yet the day after the Potomac primary victories the iShares Small Cap Value (IJS) gained 2 percent to the S&P 500's (SPY) 1 percent." And "the day after [Obama's] Wisconsin/Hawaii victories, IJS outperformed SPY once again."

• When you look at corporations and stocks all day, they begin to take on personalities -- and those, in turn, can become useful political metaphors. Portfolio.com's Matt Cooper, likens Obama to Apple Inc. and Clinton to Dell. Cooper says the Clintons, like Dell, are still a strong brand with a thriving following, but they lack that special something: "The first woman president is arguably as radical a step, as big a moment on the world stage, as the first African-American one. But she's not a new brand. She's Dell, strong, solid, formidable -- but lacking Apple's immense coolness."

• Dan Gross at Slate extends the comparisons: Obama is the alternative-energy sector, while Clinton is Citigroup. Obama is "hybrid, next-generation upstart, unafraid of entrenched market leaders, and embraced by corn-growing Iowans, Silicon Valley venture capitalists, and East Coast moneymen." Clinton, meanwhile, is a "New York-based, enormously well-capitalized, longstanding market leader whose name is synonymous with the sector it dominates. A powerhouse in the 1990s is having difficulty reclaiming past glory. “

Read the first comment at the bottom of the full post—definitely slanted way left…

The Secret Ingredient for a Successful Marriage

In the book Blink, Malcolm Gladwell sheds some light on the scientific methods used by University of Washington professor Dr. John Gottman regarding his insightful in predictions of successful marriages. Amazingly, in about five minute’s time, Gottman can predict the future success or failure of a marriage with an accuracy rate over 90 percent.

Gottman’s ideas are followed up again in the book I’m currently reading in the chapter titled: The Secret Ingredient in Every Satisfying Marriage. Here is a quick excerpt that makes complete sense, but probably overlooked by many couples:

“You’re undoubtedly thinking, How does he do it? Dr. Gottman has identified specific behaviors that are marriage destroyers and others that are marriage protectors. Far and away, the most significant marriage protector boils down to one word (are you ready to be underwhelmed?): friendship. Not money, not exotic getaways, not creative romantic rendezvous. No, merely friendship.”

After years of research, Gottman arrives at this conclusion:

“The determining factor in whether wives feel satisfied with sex, romance, and passion in their marriage is, by 70 percent, the quality of the couple’s friendship. For men, the determining factor is, by the same 70 percent, the quality of the couple’s friendship. So men and women come from the same planet after all….Friendship fuels the flames of romance because it offers the best protection against feeling adversarial towards your spouse.”

This simple concept came as a little bit of a shocker to me. I expected something more elaborate—something more elusive. Especially when you think that we all have the knowledge, skills, and abilities to be a good friend. It isn’t some magical combination of profound acts that create great marriages. In fact, they all stem from friendship. We have learned over time how to be good friends. Now take these basic principles and apply them to your marriage—make your spouse your best friend first.